I have to warn you, this is going to be one of those soul-searching posts. Not so much soul-searching for you, but for me. It’s also gonna be on the long side, so if you don’t have time to read it now, I understand. I’m not posting all of this to fish for compliments or for you to “feel” something for me. It’s just what this blog is all about…His Heart and Home.
I named the blog His Heart and Home because both my heart and home are His and I wanted to share how God works in my heart and my home. Well, this month God has been at work on my heart! He has done some deep, I mean really deep (say that with a deep voice) cleaning in my heart.
He has revealed to me that there is one thing has GOT to go! It can no longer have a place in the blog. What is it?
I have to go! I can no longer be the focus of this blog.
Getting some “new to me” furniture this weekend! So excited!
I look at the stats and either get all excited or disappointed when I see how many people have viewed the blog. Rarely do I stop to give thanks to God for bringing each person to the blog to read what I have to say. Rarely do I stop and thank you, the readers for taking time out of your day to read what I have to say. Some of you even take a moment to leave a comment. God doesn’t have to lead you here, nor do you have to read and comment, but He does and you do and I take that for granted and give myself the glory. That has to stop.
What my breakfast room table really looks like most days!
I also have to stop trying to be everybody else! All my life I have looked at other people’s work and think “that’s better than mine. I wish I had thought of that.” I feel sorry for myself and don’t realize that the idea I had was given to me by God. I forget that He allows me to see all the great ideas other’s have and gives me inspiration from them. He allows me to take great ideas and make them my own. The feeling sorry for myself is a form of pride, and there is no room for pride in God’s kingdom. It’s gotta go!
My youngest takes over the dining room in the summer!
I am envious of other decorating bloggers because my house is far from being as clean or as nicely decorated as theirs. I get frustrated because of our present financial situation doesn’t allow me to afford those nice things. I forget to focus on the fact that I do have some really nice things and everything I have, God has allowed me to have it. I forget that just because I can’t “afford it” right now doesn’t mean that I can’t ask God to show me a way to save for it or find a cheaper way to do it, or to even repurpose what I have.
My bed is made, but far from looking like I want it too!
I also need to apply what I just said to the design of my blog. No, I can’t afford to hire a designer nor can I get something like ProPhoto at the moment. All I have to do is ask God to show me how I can get a more professional looking blog. He does hear those prayers and answers them.
The knee board is not a part of the decor.
But the main thing that has to go is the idea of monetizing the blog. Nothing wrong with wanting to earn a few extra dollars or even make a living with blogging, but making money has been my sole purpose for blogging and that has not brought God any glory at all! Ruth Soukup from Living Well Spending Less writes in her book How to Blog for Profit Without Selling Your Sole, “If your ONLY goal in starting a blog is to make money, you will fail.”
I’m living proof of that!
Lack of rain has all the flowers dying.
I recently read a blog post that was so humbling to me. It made me step back and take a good hard look at why I blog. Her reasons for blogging were way different from mine. I could just hear God telling me “that is what I want for you, my child.” Thank you, Kelly, for your humble attitude!
Except for the weeds! They are as vibrant as ever!
So, from now on, I am going to do my best to put God and you, the readers first! This has nothing to do with me or with money. It has to do with God, His working in my heart and how He uses this house and home for His glory. It’s about giving credit where credit is due. That’s what it’s really all about anyway, right?
It’s time for me to get real and stop trying to be somebody I am not. It’s time to start showing you my heart and home for what they really are! Not so glamorous or clean!
Over the next few weeks, probably more like months, I will be at work making changes, not only in my attitude, but in the look of the blog. There is much work to do in my heart, in my home and on the blog. I am asking you to please pray for me as I seek God’s direction.
Thank you for taking the time to read all of this. It is a long post, full of my thoughts that I just needed to get out there. I’m sure there are others who are also struggling like I am and need to know they aren’t alone! Trust me! You are not alone!
I do hope to one day be able to earn some extra money with the blog, but until then, I’m trusting God to bring us just what we need, when we need it. More importantly, I’m trusting Him to bring me more awesome readers like you!
Thank you for your support and your prayers. I would be nowhere without you!